Dog Proverbs

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Dog Proverbs

"Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about little puppies."
-- Gene Hill

"In dog years I'm dead" -- Unknown

"Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the
car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at
nothing right in your ear." -- Dave Barry

"I wonder what goes through his mind when he sees us peeing in his
water bowl." -- Penny Ward Moser

"The dog's kennel is not the place to keep a sausage." -- Danish

"Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend, and inside
of a dog, it's too dark to read." -- Groucho Marx.

"The scientific name for an animal that doesn't either run from or
fight its enemies is lunch." -- Michael Friedman

"To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of
dogs." -- Aldous Huxley

"A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around
three times before lying down." -- Robert Benchley

"Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think
that is how dogs spend their lives." -- Sue Murphy

"Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac who stays up all
night wondering if there really is a Dog?" -- Unknown

"I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and
give the wrong answers." -- Unknown

"I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the
guts to bite people themselves." -- August Strindberg

"No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless
absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation." --
Fran Lebowitz

"Ever consider what they must think of us? I mean, here we come back
from a grocery store with the most amazing haul- chicken, pork, half
cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!" -- Anne

"I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird
religious cult." -- Rita Rudner

"My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents
a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money." -- Joe Weinstein

"Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant." -- Unknown

"If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I
have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons." -- James

"You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person
with pets." -- Nora Ephron

"Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you
are wonderful." -- Ann Landers

"Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should relax
and get used to the idea." -- Robert A. Heinlein

"In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone
should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore
him." -- Dereke Bruce, Taipei, Taiwan

"There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your
face." -- Ben Williams

"When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem." --
Edward Abbey

"Cat's Motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make
it look like the dog did it." -- Unknown

"Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of
his tail.." -- Unknown

"No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as
the dog does." -- Christopher Morley

"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves
himself." -- Josh Billings

"Man is a dog's idea of what God should be." -- Holbrook Jackson

"The average dog is a nicer person than the average person." --
Andrew A. Rooney

"He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are
his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true,
to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of
such devotion" -- Unknown

"Heaven goes by favour. If it went by merit, you would stay out and
your dog would go in." -- Mark Twain

"I care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the
better for it." -- Abraham Lincoln

"If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where
they went." -- Unknown

"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not
bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man."
-- Mark Twain

"Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great
Dane." -- Smiley Blanton

"I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed
contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are
nuts." -- John Steinbeck

"My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We
can't decide whether to ruin our carpets or ruin our lives." -- Rita

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